It happens to us all to act in haste, without really thinking about the consequences of our actions. At one point or another, we’ve all responded quickly to a loved one or a co-worker without measuring what these words would provoke in the other.

We feel good in these situations since we are not really in control. Our words escape us, our behaviors go beyond us. Self-control then arises from the assimilation of social boundaries and knowing the behaviors to be adopted within one’s environment. To fulfill oneself according to his own aspirations, it is obvious that one must know how to fight against certain automatic reflexes. Here are some rules that will help you to never go beyond the limits of what is socially acceptable and make use of one of the main pillars in any self-development: self-control.

  • Analyze your personality :

To develop a balanced psychic life, one must indulge in introspection. By analyzing each compartment of your life, you will quickly highlight areas where your ability to control yourself is lacking. Do you have trouble cashing the critics? An omnipresent fear of failure or rejection? It is by probing your deepest feelings that you will discover the reasons for your discomfort and the means to overcome it.

Most people who react violently are unaware of their weaknesses and ignore the true causes of their impulsive behavior. As a result, it is necessary to identify the triggering factors so as not to explode as these feelings surface. Do not forget that knowledge is power. Becoming aware of one’s tendency to overreact is already a first step towards self-control.

  • Evacuate your negative feelings :

Once you have identified the elements that can trigger reactive impulses, you need to focus on working on them on a daily basis to turn the negative impulses into positive sustainable dispositions. When you realize that criticism can make you grow above and beyond what you’d imagined. it is up to you to exult your anger in a way other than confrontation, register in a gym, boxing classes, or do long walks in the forest. You must find a parallel occupation that will allow you to regain some psychic stability.

The negative feelings that stagnate deep within you and your environment, they’re frequent negative stimulations that should not become triggers that activate inappropriate reactions. You can not insult your superior or slam the door on your partner for so little.

  • Strengthen your self-confidence :

Relational interactions vary in many ways, some people will always be there to try to destabilize you. And if they succeed, you will always be, unfortunately, the big loser. On the other hand, if you succeed in incorporating and internalizing the fact that you are better than that, such attempts will only have the positive effect of helping you grow better and stronger.

Self-confidence is precisely this ability to ignore anything outside of you. You know who you are and what you want and to maintain that strength, make use of the power of self-control. 

As we all know, doubting yourself undermines your credibility in the eyes of the world and therefore weakens self-control, how could you act in a positive way if you constantly consider the judgment of others?

So the answer is self-control, control your emotions, you must let them invade you without repressing them while preventing them from dictating your behavior. Self-control involves a long process of understanding one’s feelings and incorporating them into one’s whole personality. Never forget that self-control is never born naturally in us, and that it requires diligent practice over a lifetime.

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